There are many times in my life where I have wanted something I later found myself regretting. As a kid, my reasoning was justified. But as I've aged, with wisdom I am able to realize how I lacked understanding of what I was really chasing.
As Jesus was nailed to the cross the crowd was chanting and cheering. In their ignorance they were wanting justice. This man Jesus, had claimed the unthinkable. Jesus claimed to be God and spoke with authority. Such talk rattled their religious culture and challenged their pursuit of self-righteousness. When our world is challenged, we tend to shift blame and look for a scapegoat. So what they thought was retribution on behalf of God, only served to preserve their way of life. I wonder if given clarity, could they look back and see the justice they demanded meant seeing themselves up on the cross.
"Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do"
// Luke 23:34 //
These words that Jesus spoke on the cross haunt me. I am reminded of them often. How many times have I thought that this life owes me something? I don't know about you, but I have noticed that life doesn't always work out the way I want.
And yet we all fall into this thought that it should.
When we are wronged or dealt a bad hand, we think that things will be made right by the end. Even as Christians, we can fall for subscribing to karma. Surely God wants us to live a life we deem as good... right?
As things outside of our control unfold, a sense of entitlement can cause us to expect justice; yet be blinded to our own transgressions. It's like Adam and Eve being upset that the apple was a granny smith rather than honeycrisp. We get caught up in micro justice and lose sight of the greater injustice that put us in this fallen world to begin with. If we're not careful, we may find ourselves substituting our righteousness for Christ's. Living in way dedicated to proving my version of "right" rather than trusting in His.
When I get so focused on getting what is mine, these words from Luke 23:34 wake me up from my faulty thinking.
Jesus forgives my understanding. Even in my ability to lose focus of my own need for salvation, Christ forgives. Not just in my sinful actions but in my failing to see them as such. Jesus asks the Father to forgive our lack of connecting the dots that we belong on that Cross; not Him.
Jesus' sacrifice was a uneven substitution. Like trading your Michael Jordan rookie card for a Sam Bowie rookie card. (Who would do that?) No exchange could justify such an undeserved outcome. This is what grace is.
God has every right to allow our consequences to play out. He did not have to rescue us from death; although sometimes we walk around thinking that He did. Our "it wouldn't be fair" is a miss calculation of the weight of the exchange.
Jesus was the only substitute able to match the righteousness of God. God chose to pay for our unrighteousness with Himself. And even when we lose sight of that, Christ fights for our clarity to see how far His grace has gone. How can we live under such grace and still waste our life focused on proving we're not such a bad person? Imagine living empowered by who He says we are in Him.
But even that chase to prove ourselves, justify our way, is not something that Christ will allow to keep us from His forgiveness.
He sees you in your blindness and wants nothing more than to help you see.
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